Thursday, June 28, 2012

THE GRASS ISN'T ALWAYS GREENER

I remember when I was a little girl planning my fairy tale wedding and finding names for the children I would have. In my dream, my Prince Charming would take care of everything: the bills, house repairs, pay a cook, pay a housekeeper and any and everything else he could do to make my life as a princess easy. Along the way, I married a few good husbands, each of whom did their part to keep me as spoiled as my daddy did when I was growing up. As I look back over my life, I realize I've had it very easy. But in between husbands I had to operate as the head of household: paying bills, paying for house repairs, pay to have the grass cut and anything and everything else that had to be done. On top of that I worked full time, went to college full time and raised two sets of twins. (Yeah, I was Superwoman!)

(Fade to the present) As a member of the Baby Boomers I have become a part of the new "married single" That is a new term I just this minute made up! Pay me if you use it!!! However, the married single is this: a wife or husband who is suddenly forced to take over the operation of the household  because of the illness or the death of their spouse. So while I gladly allowed myself to be taken out of the game and relegated to a seat on the sidelines, I let myself forget more than I had in my lifetime learned. And let me tell you, the grass wasn't greener on the sidelines. It was brown and dusty from the footprints of others who had chosen to sit on the bench with me. I should've stayed in the game even if it was just on a part time or limited basis.


If I could teach women anything before I die it would be not to remove yourself or allow yourself to be relieved of your duties. If you haven't already, learn how to change a tire, change the furnace filters yourself so you know how it's done. Clean your dryer vent. Find and know how to operate the fuse box. Become familiar with your lawn care people and the exterminators. The one thing I've had to get used to doing is driving on the highway. I had no idea it had been about twenty-one years since I had actually driven any distance longer than going to work, school or shopping. Women don't limit the things you can do for yourself. Yes, it is great to have someone take care of you. But it's so much better to take care of yourself!

Staying true to green!

Rosa

Tuesday, June 12, 2012

GREEN WITH ENVY

I usually talk about most things green and while this particular post will be about green, it will take a different direction.
ENVY or green with envy is what's on my mind tonight. I celebrated my birthday recently and years before I got to this age I thought about all of the things I would've liked to have accomplish before now; a bucket list so to speak. I've always wanted to be on Broadway. I loved to sing growing up and was called on quite regularly to lead a church song or to sing a solo. It wasn't that I   was the greatest singer, I think the church used me because I wasn't scared to stand up in front of the congregation. I was cast by a few local civic and community theaters but never as a lead, always in the background. I wanted to stand center stage on Broadway and sing to the heavens. I wanted a casting agent to sit front and center and ask someone after the performance "who was that and why haven't I heard of her before?" I wanted that agent to hand me his card and tell me to call his secretary to set up an appointment to meet with him so he could discuss a leading movie role he had for me.

Which brings me to the second thing on that "wish I had done" list; become an actress. I wanted to take Hollywood by storm. I got married young and had my children early and by the time I could clearly think about making my way to either Broadway or Hollywood, I had too many ties to the small city I had grown up in. There was always something else in the way of my seeking my dream. How dare I think about taking 4 small children away from their grandparents, their school, their friends and their lives? And by the time I was ready to spread my wings, Hollywood had their Debbie Morgans, Loretta Devines, Lynn Whitfields, Lonette McKees and so on and so forth. So those dreams died and the only stage I sing on now is riding in the car and singing to the old songs I grew up listening to...thank God for Sirrius radio!

The third thing I should've wanted to do was to maintain a decent weight and reasonable health. But once I quit smoking in 1988, I immediately gained more weight than I care to announce publicly and sadly never looked back. Just when I tried to do something about losing weight, poor health got in the way. Then when the health was under control, my husband got ill and whatever progress had been made took a back seat to getting him back to healthy.

There were things I wanted him and I to do together, take a dancing class, a cooking class, drive from Mississippi to California, of course taking some of the ride on Route 66 in a Corvette! There were other things along the way that I've wanted to do and now that my husband and I have all the time in the world to do them, I'm almost too tired to even try.

So I live my life vicariously through my children. One of my daughters and her boyfriend recently rode in a helicopter (also on my list). They went to a gun range (on my list too). Both of my daughters know people from Hollywood well enough to call them by their first names (yep, that was on the list as well).

Perhaps my life will take a dramatic shift and suddenly I will be skinny, healthy, have enough money, plenty of time and energy to do at least some of the things I want to do. But until then I will remain emerald obsessed.



Thursday, June 7, 2012

NO MORE HOBO BAGS

Let me start out by saying I'm sad. Why? I'm sad because hobo bags are out this season. Why does that make me sad? I have a closet full of them. I love the comfort of throwing one over my shoulder and being unhindered in my shopping or whatever errand I happen to run. Structured bags -- ughh! You either have to hold them in your hand or put it in the crook of your arm. It's hard to shop without it sliding around and just simply being in the way. You can put it in the baby seat of the grocery cart, but if you turn your back on it, someone could run off with it...bet you never thought about that had you? Now with the hobo bag even you're out eating, you can place the it in your lap. You can squish it up without fear of ruining whatever fabric it's made of. I guess my point is that a hobo bag gives you a lot of flexibility and freedom. You just don't have to be as careful with it. Structured bags require a little more work. However, since I'm going to be forced to carry the unforgiving purses I'm going to have to add a few to the limited number I have. One has caught my eye. I found this Kate Spade New York Satchel - Grand Street Melinda at Bloomingdale's and it's on sale!

pic provided by bloomingdales.com